"And I Know I'll Always Be Blessed With Love"

"Angels"

 So when I'm lying in my bed

Thoughts running through my head

And I feel the love is dead

I'm loving angels instead

And through it all she offers me protection

A lot of love and affection

Whether I'm right or wrong

And down the waterfall

Wherever it may take me

I know that life won't break me

When I come to call, she won't forsake me

I'm loving angels instead

When I'm feeling weak

And my pain walks down a one way street

I look above

And I know I'll always be blessed with love

And as the feeling grows

She breathes flesh to my bones

And when love is dead

I'm loving angels instead"

Excerpt from "Angels" by Robbie Williams 

Love And Honor Are Never Wasted

The Greek word for "Aggelos" has two meanings. 

One is the supernatural being we know as an "Angel",

The other carries the broader meaning of "Messenger".

For the moment we will be focused on the Messenger function of the 

Angels in our lives, or in this blog, in my own life. 

The messengers in my life are full human with human flaws and

 human weaknesses and human limitations. 

They are however, messengers sent by The Creator when I need them most.

Usually in my life this is after a break-up. 

I have 'always been a Lover, since before I drew a breathe" as Derek Webb sings. 

Being an INFJ Male, the True Romantic of all 16 personalities, and also the rarest, 

Finding someone I can deeply connect with has been especially difficult. 

Deep connection is however the deepest need of the INFJ Soul. 

So to find one of these rare Souls that can speak my language and 

Then to lose them, is disheartening to say the least. 

I imagine it is for others who each sing their own specific song with a 

Melody and Harmony and Lyrics most others won't be able to follow easily. 

I invest all that I have into relationships of every kind.

This is especially true however when I believe I may have 

Finally found my Sweetest Friend.

Sometimes the Intent is confirmed through multiple Witnesses,

Through Dreams and Words and Visions and Circumstances.

Fasting and Prayer and Answered Prayers.

Yet still, We all have Choice.

Esther and Ruth and Rebekah all were asked to choose

By someone that spoke with Revelation into their Lives.

Mordecai, Naomi, Eleazer all asked, but never demanded.

Some people in our lives choose to be Orpah over Ruth.

Sometimes people were never intended to be who we 

Believe they were intended to be in our Lives. 

Over these last 7 years I have noticed a pattern.

When the meeting seems to have truly been a Divine Conspiracy

And Circumstances or Fear or Trauma influenced Human Choices 

And the Enemy used the Past to get in the way of choosing the Future,

Its a kind of robbery.

When I had the best of intentions and was the best that I could be,

There is a kind of recompense that comes with being robbed.

In the Torah (The Law of God), if a person is robbed

And the Thief is identified and the Victim has no Guilt.

The Thief has to pay back 5 or 7 times what was stolen.

The Thief is ultimately the Enemy (HaSatan-the Accuser/Deceiver) when all is said and done.

This hasn't been true for all my relationships.

Those in which her or I lost or we lost our way together simply 

Produced bad fruit for everyone involved.

Anxiety, Mistrust, Regret, Delays and Lost Opportunities.

However, For those when I was truly robbed of a Sweetest Friend,

There was a Sweet Recompense for the stolen investments. 

I lose a Sweetest Friend but make even Sweeter Sisters and Brothers.

In the last Round of Loss I lost a Cherokee Sweetest Friend and Ministry Partner

And the three Daughters that would have been Grafted-In. 

It was a very short lived Courtship but even in that short time

I gained both a mentor and a friend in an older brother that was her Mentor.

It also rekindled my Counseling Sessions with the Pastors who covered our Courtship.

So they can instill priceless and Generational Curse Breaking Wisdom into my Life. 

I also reconnected with my Hebrew Hearts Singles Family that I dearly missed.

In the previous Round of Seeming Loss that lasted several painful months.

I gained a Counselor Friend that has opened ministry doors to teach Dream Interpretation.

I also gained a Pastor Friend that has let me become part of his Church Unofficially.

I gained numerous friends in the Faith from those two new friends as well

That have made my time in East Tennessee so much more meaningful.

I have lost count of the coffees and bonfires and dashboard confessionals

From that one Divine Arrangement that didn't work out as was intended.

Then her and I became friends again in the end when it was all said and done.

This friend was not another one "lost in the bitterness" as The Fray sings about.

In the Round of Loss in between the two mentioned above,

The girl I came to see walked away but a new friend from Arkansas stayed.

This new friend started the GoFundMe that helped me get visitation 

With my two Daughters restarted after not seeing them for 10 months straight. 

The longest and most agonizing ten months of my life were brought to an end

Through a friend gained through a romantic disappointment.

There were two missed opportunities for a Family in Florida.

But from the Greek missed opportunity I had

A Divine Appointment from Portugal

That was actually her best friend and employee!

While visiting the missed Divine Appointment from Portugal at a Synagogue,

I met my Jewish Faith Sister and later her Native American Husband that is now my Brother.

Both of whom soon moved from Florida to Tennessee.

Those long drives that seemed like wasted time with many phone calls also 

Produced a strengthened bond with a California-Florida Friend that is full of Grace and Wisdom.

And in the first encounter where I was told prophetically that someone 

Was my intended but she chose a different path, but in her Adopted Sister,

I gained an Adopted Sister for Life. 

This Puerto Rican Older Sister has seen me through Hell and Water High. 

I can't forget to mention the family in Sacramento that took me in with open arms

And let me lead a Passover in their home. The brother lives in Tennessee now.  

I'm still good friends with the girl who is one of the smarted people I've ever known.

Then there is my Spirit Sister in Kentucky sent to carry me through

Heartache after Heartache in the 7 years I have known her.

We strangely met in person the night of what would have been my 

6th Wedding Anniversary. 

The first Anniversary after the Divorce.

A different kind of Help-Mate arrived.

I was instructed to "Fight For Hearts" earlier that same Hebrew Day.

She and I started a Ministry together with her future Husband.

Take Heart my friends, Love and Honor are never really wasted

And cannot ever be truly Stolen.

You may not get to love your Intended sometimes,

But you are left loving Angels (God's Messengers) instead.

 "Yet if he is caught, he must repay sevenfold,

giving up all the wealth of his house." 

Proverbs 6:31 Tree Of Life Version

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